I wish I were meeting my fiftieth year with more grace than this but here I am, still grumping ceaselessly into the past. Jessica Anne came to town from Chicago. We had ribs, donuts, and a reading at the Benson wine bar. The boy gave me this card after asking me if I was like twenty-nine. I read Sara Lippmann’s Lech and was blown away by the sentences, setting, and characters. I’m still throwing hand weights around in the back yard nearly every day. An agent asked for a partial manuscript of my Nebraska novel, a great boost and making me feel a little less crazy. Curious why they don’t ask for the whole thing; it’s not like they have to read it all.

This month’s mix is another head-scratcher. I can’t hear music. Don’t know how to explain it. If I could blast it all the time that would be one thing but there’s always an interruption. So I’m left wondering how much I like this song or that, or if I just want to like it to maintain some youth. Anyway, “Dance Now” is a heck of a ditty and I’m digging Sea Lion’s Stop at Nothing ep. The mix starts off with Greg Dulli covering Hope Sandoval; I heard The Afghan Whigs’s “Gentleman” while shopping with my kid at Whole Foods a couple weeks ago. If that doesn’t encapsulate the weirdness of fifty years on this earth I don’t know what does.